Re-imagined

I am back.

The commitment to post daily proved to be overwhelming. This site became a chore that I would rather ignore than update. I do not want to abandon ship just yet though. I will post as I can my thoughts, stories, and updates. The goal is to increase my post length and eventually write daily without stressing myself out with promises.

My thoughts are on work now. I can’t tell if some of my coworkers are lazy or if they are unaware of what their responsibilities are. For sure some are less proactive than others but I am unwilling to write them all off as lazy. I won’t judge anyone for needing to turn off their brains from time to time, I definitely have days when I don’t want to complete my assignments or really anything else. Sometimes though, the directions I give have me feeling like my Mother. That is not a bad thing, it is actually nice. Tonight a courtesy clerk suggested that he should not have to straighten the storage closet because he had not messed it up. This instance reminded me of my brother refusing to take out the trash, when he was a teen, because he had not contributed to its contents. In both cases I believe the claims of tidiness were quite deluded and I based my response on what my Mother says to her children. It is summed up like this. We do not do chores because it is what we deserve, we do them to benefit the rest of the household or team.

Everyone one there is capable of so much. I wish I could just take each of them by the hand and show them what is possible. I could show them the value of honesty, integrity, and a mind that seeks improvement. Unfortunately, there is no time for that and there is still so much I need to grow in. I want to see people succeed in ways beyond what they can dream. My heart turns blue when I think about my friends who have never experienced God as good. There is infinite goodness and love in him, everything he does is for our benefit. With him life is simplified even if it isn’t always easy. The simplicity refers only to the loss of worry because adventure is multiplied exponentially every day I spend with Jesus. I have found crazy joy and freedom when I live life according to his plan.

God is going to use my desire to hold people up until they can stand on their own for something really cool and I can not wait. I can’t really tell if I sound conceited or not. I hope you can see that this post just kinda burst right from my heart. Perhaps tomorrow’s post will not focus so much on me. No promises though, this is after all my site.

See ya again soon 🙂

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Day 5 – Hobby Habits

I am starting to view this blog as practice for when school starts back and I have daily tasks to work on. If I can update this blog every day then I might have enough endurance to make it through the next semester. Instead of saying I missed a day yesterday lets just say I was resting for the Sabbath.

Their are a few habits I have enjoyed this summer. Writing this blog is a new one but I have also started to get back into letter writing. In the 7th grade my Aunt began writing to me because I had moved to Michigan and when I came back to Tennessee, to visit my dad and everyone else, I would correspond with my mom. That mainly lasted for that year while we lived up there, though I did try to write notes to a friend in MI, My cousin, and even a neighbor across the street a few times. A friend I met last year at school has returned to her home in east TN to be a camp counselor. I have mailed a handful of envelopes containing my thoughts that I might otherwise send in a text to her. The recent messages have been about Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. She agreed to read and discuss it with me. Studying together is a fantastic source of accountability.

Reading Ephesians, and the Bible in general, has been a fascinating and exciting practice. I have done most of my reading while on breaks at work. Boy, do those breaks ever fly by fast when I am reading something good, and usually I hit the clock in a much more thankful mood. All this reading has not only adjusted my perspective, but it also has lead to some good conversations with customers and coworkers. This summer is not the first time I have read or even enjoyed the Bible but it has reminded me of how necessary it is for my life.

I would life to continue these habits throughout the year and maybe even pick up some new ones. Perhaps listening to music, quilting, calligraphy, or dancing. I should probably stick with classics like dishes, laundry, and cleaning the bathroom before getting too extreme.

What is a habit or hobby I should try next?

Day 3 – Back to Work

The last 2 days have been busy in the best ways. Thursday I continued a couple of long overdue communications, started some laundry, assisted with some admin tasks for ACG, and spent the evening meeting with our leadership team. I spent Friday with my nephew. We made gift card purchases, saw the new Spiderman (accompanied by my bff), and had dinner with family and his friends at Buffalo Wild Wings.

A new day is dawning and it is time to go back to work. Fresh experiences and opportunities await me today. But first a shower.

See ya later 🙂

Day 2 – The Hard Part

Today my family will be celebrating my nephew’s 9th birthday. He is only ten years younger than me but I would still like to remember the good ‘old’ days when I was 9. For me 9 was the end of an era. My brother and sister, being much older than I, had moved out of our home that my parents had designed and built. Then this house so spacious, well made, and on land surrounded by Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins was put on the market. We could no longer afford it. When my siblings left, it marked the start of their journeys into independence. For me leaving the only place I knew simply marked the first time my heart was broken and left me raw to deal with what was next.

My parents’ relationship was cracking. They both loved me and wanted to protect me from the chaos. I was going to say I didn’t expect it, that would be a lie though. I think I still saw it coming, though my standard glasses were optimistic ones. No amount of mom’s hugs and dad’s fun diversions could protect me from the rocky waters we were paddling through. When I was 10 the divorce was finalized.

You may be wondering where the good in “good old times” is. It is there I promise.

That was probably the first time I was able to look at my life and know God was with me. Everything I knew of, school, home, and family was turned upside down, yet I never felt afraid or unsafe. At the time, I did not have a very personal relationship with Jesus, but I knew that God was my constant protector. I don’t remember ever being bitter about the divorce. I was sad, not angry or hopeless. Many of these emotions could have been perfectly legitimate things for me to feel. However, I am so thankful for the clarity God gave me in a time that could have been ruled by uncertainty. Looking back I can see that this was the first time my heart was healed.

The gatherings of both sides of my family has lost any painful awkwardness, as the years have passed. Tonight’s dinner will be enjoyed by people whose hearts are full of love for my nephew and each other. We will have a fun time celebrating the start of my nephew’s 9th year and I am willing to bet not a single one of us will be thinking about the craziness of 10 years ago.

 

See ya tomorrow 🙂

 

Day 1 – Scuba Cat

Hello and Welcome

This just so happens to be my first post in an (hopefully) ever growing collection. I am excited to begin this journey into consistent self examination. Though I’m sure many of my updates will be anything but philosophical.

Let me create some context to start you off with.

  • I live in Middle Tennessee with my mom, surrounded by my friends and family.
  • I will soon begin my second year of college as a freshman.
  • I work in customer service at a small store of a major grocery company.
  • I am interning with a non-profit.

The non-profit is a christian ministry, by the name of A Called Generation, who’s mission is best just repeated from the site.

“YOUNG PEOPLE ENCOUNTERING JESUS, EMPOWERED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT, EQUIPPED TO LIVE THE GOSPEL, ENGAGING WITH THEIR COMMUNITIES, AND UNITING THE BODY OF CHRIST.”

As one of several interns, I am being trained in discipline and leadership, as well as practical life skills. This blog is actually an assignment to be completed weekly by the group. My fellow trainees are quality friends who have committed to living lives driven by the love of God. We are all unique in our talents and passions, but we are unified in our goal see our culture changed by the power of the one true God working in our daily lives.

At work I represent Christ by respecting my supervisors and doing good work. There is an extra step to share the word and pray, with coworkers and customers, that I have only taken a handful of times. In this new season I will be more intentional to share the hope of Christ with the people I work with. That step makes all of the difference in how I view my workplace.

Laziness has gotten the better of me this summer. Little has been achieved because I let the lazy monster control my school year. Lack of motivation and follow through left far too many F’s on my transcript last year. That has lead to a bum May and June, and next fall being my 3rd freshmen semester. Clearly, I need to be trained in discipline.

Friends and family are most difficult to be obedient around. The closer someone is to me, the more likely they are to see my ugly. This is avoided by keeping easy to maintain expectations of myself therefore no one can be disappointed with me. To follow Christ I am going to have to go outside of my comfort zone and live by faith. Faith is a truly rewarding lifestyle. Let’s see if I can keep this up.